Just bought a TPX bat and a ticket to LA
Pete Wentz and Ashlee Simpson had a baby and named it Bronx Mowgli. The amount of violent rage filling my body right now puts Ike Turner to shame. I feel so sorry for this kid. Do you two shitstains understand the vast amount of “Jungle Book” jokes this kid will have to endure for the rest of his life? Do you realize that if this kid ever wants a bank loan, he’s going to have to write that down on an application? And how sad is it when your first name is Bronx and that’s still not the most ridiculous part of your name? Emo Bangs and The Simpson Sister Without the Giant Rack need to be taken out behind their Malibu mansion and raped by rabid sabertooth cats covered in mange and skin rashes. You named your kid like you name a dog. He’s not a dog. He’s actually a miniature human being with complex thought processes and and emotions. Cause I’m telling you right now, while it may be cute for a baby, when that kid is 13 it’s not going to be as fun to hear when he’s getting beaten with socks full of soap in the locker room.
“Honey, does Baby Gap sell skinny jeans and guyliner?”
