This is an urgent announcement. Everyone hide your honey and/or picanic baskets. The bears have become self-aware and begun using simple tools. It’s only a matter of time before they invade human society and become our overlords. Or as I shall call them: Emper-Roars.
2 Things
I apologize for neglecting the blog. Work has been hectic lately. So here are 2 random observances.
1. I was driving behind a lady today that had 3 bumper stickers on her car about her golden retriever. One of which was “My Golden Retriever is Smarter than Your Honor Roll Student.” Now, I believe if we use “Likelihood Subject Be Found Drinking Out of Toilet” and “Number of Butts Sniffed” as our standard of measurement for intelligence purposes, any human being beats any dog. Even a baby would be smarter than Air Bud. So, regardless of how barren this woman’s uterus must be, I think 3 dog bumper stickers is unnecessary. Especially when one conveys so much arrogance about an animal that spends 90% of its day licking its own crotch.
2. Hardees now offers fried bologna breakfast sandwiches. Have we really reached the point where people feel a need to have someone else prepare their fried bologna? Mad dad ate fried bologna as a kid. You know why? Because they couldn’t fucking afford to eat breakfast at Hardees. So Mr. Hardees, please stick to serving Bacon Ranch Fries to every car that leans heavily to the drivers side and stop offering cooked Oscar Mayer throw-away scraps as a delicacy.
Living the adult life in KC as an insurance agent (www.halpinco.com) while still trying to keep some sanity. Things are going well.
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